Flying Spaghetti Monsters: Deliciously Irreverent.

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What do you get when Pinterest and Facebook collide?

Inspiration:)

I have been Facebook friends (and WTE message board friends) with a girl named Sara for a few years now. If you ask Sara what her religion is she will tell you proudly, FSM. Oh, you have never heard of the Church of FSM? Let me share with you.



Swedish designer Niklas Jansson created this interpretation of Michelangelo's The Creation of Adam

Back in 2005 Bobby Henderson, concerned with the addition of Intelligent Design to the curriculum, wrote an open letter to the Kansas School Board informing them that if ID was going to be taught then he wanted the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster to receive equal representation. The theories are similar in many ways.

• They both refute the logic of Science and Evolution.
• They are both based on books, written by men.
• They both have a (supposedly) fictional character at their helm

For the most part Pastafarians are a peace (and noodle) loving bunch. You will find the occasional one who gets upset when the noodles aren't al dente but as a whole they are very laid back. In fact one of the main tenets of FSM is that there be no dogma and, above all else, not to take themselves too seriously. Sign me up:)

Where am I going with all this?

One day I was putting off doing my housework looking up recipes on Pinterest when I saw this culinary abomination touting itself to be the best snack for kids ever.



Yum! Entrails.

Really? Have we lowered the bar so far that shoving dried spaghetti through tube steak and boiling it passes for a "nutritious" snack? It defies logic, it defies common sense. Calling it nutritious flies in the face of science. It is the Intelligent Design of kids cuisine.

Enter FSM:)

I have long been of the opinion that anything found on Pinterest can either be A) effed up beyond all recognition or B) adapted into something even more wonderful. I got to thinking about how I could make this recipe better. Hmmm, what goes with spaghetti that's healthier than hot dogs? Meatballs perhaps? I mean let's face it, if you can stick spaghetti through a hot dog then ostensibly you should be able to stick it through a meatball. I decided to pay homage to my FSM friends and create a dinner fit for Pastover, or Ramendan. I created my very own Flying Spaghetti Monsters.



...and FSM said unto them "Let there be dinner" and there was, and it was good.

These deliciously irreverent little meatballs can be made either as a snack or a full blown meal. Since there are roughly 6785439 different meatball recipes out there I won't bore you with my version. I will point out that using regular ground beef works a little better than leaner ground beef and spaghettini cooks a little faster than spaghetti. Other than that you're on your own. Use whatever meatball recipe you want, use whatever marinara sauce recipe you want. There is no dogma here. We don't judge.

Skewer the meatballs with pieces of spaghettini. You can use a little or a lot. It's your meal. Boil a big pot of water, add a dash of salt and a splash of olive oil. Once you have a good rolling boil going, drop your meatball/pasta combos into the pot. Let them boil for 7-10 minutes depending on how you like your pasta. The meatballs cook quickly, so don't worry about them. Once the pasta is done, they'll be done (provided you haven't made them too big). As you can see mine are roughly the size of golf balls.




I snap my pasta in half so that there is a hearty meat to carb ratio.

What I don't understand is how the hell the pasta inside the meatball cooks. Maybe its steam, maybe its meat juice. All I know is that it cooks perfectly. Every time. A scientist might be able to explain it but I am no scientist. Besides, science is irrelevant. Every time a scientific conclusion is reached, FSM just reaches out his noodly appendage and changes the results. We're not sure why he does this, we just know that he can. Being ineffable has it's privileges.

Toss the cooked meatballs in a skillet with marinara sauce.

So once you have your pasta strained toss it into a stir fry pan/deep skillet. Add your marinara sauce and toss everything together until the pasta is evenly coated and the sauce is warmed. That's all there is to it. Kids love it, grown ups love it, Pastafarians love it. Whats not to love? It's everything you love about spaghetti and meatballs wrapped up in a satirical little package. I promise you wont go to hell for eating them. Any god that would create the duck billed platypus MUST have a sense of humor. Enjoy.

R'amen:)




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Magnet Puzzle Tutorial

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If you have been reading my blog regularly you probably remember the crafting disaster (of epic proportions) Fun With Magnets:Magnet Board Tutorial. Not my best work, that. It wasn't a total fail, I got some swanky new fridge magnets out of the deal, so there's that. I got those stickers from a coloring book I had bought my daughter. Now that coloring book has long since been abandoned, it's pages scribbled over and the best of the lot saved to the scrapbook. Left behind was a fairly pristine cover.

Can I just say, whoever thought of making tear out pages in kids coloring books is brilliant. CeeCee has the attention span of a gnat and if I gave her the whole book to play with it would be destroyed in minutes.

So anyway, here I am with a Sesame Street coloring book cover and a bunch of magnets left over from the magnet board fiasco when all it occurs to me: That part of the craft turned out OK. I'm good at cutting things out and I am good at sticking magnets to things.

Why not stick some magnets on a picture of Elmo and make a puzzle out of it?

Seriously, that's all you need

You Will Need:

• A picture you want to make into a puzzle
• Enough photo magnets to cover said picture
• A pair of scissors

I don't think it is copyright infringement. After all I bought the book. I'm not making money from it. I'm just upcycling it.

 

Step One: Cut out your image

Furry little bugger was hard to cut out:(


I was pretty lucky here, in that there were two really nice options on this cover. There was a great picture of Elmo on the front and a cute pic of Cookie Monster, Zoe and Elmo flying kites on the back. Since I apparently grow Photo Magnets and I had time to kill I decided to do both. Cutting out Elmo was a pain in the arse, I'm not going to lie. Next time I will keep the shape simple. In retrospect I should have just cut a bubble around Elmo but live and learn. The Cookie Monster picture was way easier.

Step Two: Add the magnets

Cut  the basic shape first, then go back and refine it.

Magnet paper is sticky as hell. You want to make sure you get this part right the first time. If you find you have paper hanging over the edge don't sweat it, you can always add more magnet to it. Just cut some to fit and add it in the areas you need a bit more. The goal here is to have magnet sticking out around the edges so you get a nice flat finish. You don't want paper hanging over the edges, it will just get worn and look awful with wear and tear. Carefully cut out your finished shape.

Step Three: Make it a puzzle

Finished puzzle pieces

This was the fun part. All I did was cut the pictures up into puzzle shapes. That's it! I used a simple six piece puzzle shape and eyeballed it. Next time I might make it a little more complex, since CeeCee got the hang of this one on the first day. She still loves playing with it though, it has become part of our bedtime routine. She puts it together before bed and I mess it up again for her in the morning.






This was a really easy, fun and quick project. The cost was $2.50 and for that I got two magnet puzzles, with high quality images, that are providing hours of amusement and important hand eye coordination. Not to mention bragging rights. Maybe one of these days I will get around to making the magnet board too:) I hope you guys give this one a try and please, share your results with me.

Happy Crafting Everyone:)
Mamazinga Pin It

Strawberry Fields Forever

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"Damn you Pinterest *shakes fist at computer screen*

Just when I thought I had gotten over you, you had to come sneaking back into my life. Well, I am through with you. You hear me? Through! All you do is set me up so you can knock me down.

I'm sorry baby, I didn't mean it. I love you, really. Don't be mad. I'll keep crafting."

This was me a week ago. Something has happened since then that has solidified my relationship with Pinterest and made us stronger than ever.

I made something that actually turned out good!

Did it just get cold in here?

Seriously people. This is a major accomplishment. I barely even hurt myself in the process.

I have been wanting to grow my own strawberries for a while now, CeeCee eats her own body weight in them weekly. Really I would love to grow ALL of her food since most of her issues seem to stem from food sensitivities but I have been hampered by a lack of space and lack of skill.

Enter Pinterest.

I have been in love with the idea of repurposing pallets for a while now. They are so versatile it's ridiculous. I found this idea for a pallet garden on Pinterest. I liked it but flowers aren't really my thing. Then inspiration smacked me upside my head.

I could grow strawberries!

I could grow lots of strawberries!!

I could become a strawberry farmer!!!

After a reality check, I reined myself in and went to work gathering supplies. My landlord gave me a pallet, My mom gave me a bunch of ever bearing strawberries and I hit up my local Canadian Tire Garden Center for the rest.

Supplies (minus plants, they came later)

You will need:

•  One pallet (preferably not too banged up but it doesn't have to be perfect)
• 12 bags of topsoil (or a pile of dirt from your yard, no judgement here)
• 28 strawberry plants ( I like ever bearing, they fruit all summer)
  
• 3 meters of landscape fabric (you WILL have leftovers)
• Sandpaper (doesn't have to be fancy, coarse grit will do)
• Roofing nails and a hammer
• Scissors

Step One - Prepping your pallet

Do yourself a favor, wear gloves. 

The first thing you want to do is hammer in any nails that have worked their way loose or are sticking out at funny angles. Once everything is nice and tight take your sandpaper and give the front slats a light sanding, paying attention to the edges of each slat. Don't knock yourself out trying to make it perfect, it isn't meant to be. All we are going for with this step is preventing the need for either a tetanus shot or a pair of tweezers. Rusty nails and splinters tend to take the fun out of gardening.

Step Two - Attach landscape fabric

Note the use of a solar light, lol

Fold the fabric in half so that you have a double thickness. Carefully arrange it over the back of your pallet so that the back, two sides and bottom are well covered. Cut to fit, carefully. If in doubt cut bigger than you think you need and trim off the excess. Landscape fabric is cheap like borscht so don't feel too bad about wasting a few inches. 

 

Like a big ol' wooden envelope

I used roofing nails to attach the fabric at the pallets thickest points, then I went around and sealed the edges. Be careful with the edges because there isn't a lot of wood there and you don't want to drive a nail through the front of your pallet. I like roofing nails because they have a wide head on them and I didn't want to worry about the fabric pulling free. You could probably use a staple gun if you wanted. Since I am not allowed to use dangerous power tools (for the greater good) I went the old fashioned route. I only smacked my thumb with a hammer once (ok, twice) . 

 

Step Three - Fill it up:)

The top eight are sad pandas:(

Now that I had my garden box it was time to fill it. Word to the wise, put it exactly where you want it before you fill it because these suckers are HEAVY. Once I had it leaning in its happy place I just cut the tops off the bags and dumped them in from the top. I stuck two strawberry plants in each opening, shoved a couple of solar lights in the top (we really do have ENTIRELY too many solar lights laying around, I think they're breeding) gave it a good watering and that was that. Sadly I don't think some of the top eight are going to make it (transplants from momma's garden) but the rest are doing just fine.

Once you have watered a couple of times the dirt will stay in better.

Well there you have it people, proof that a complete and utter klutz CAN complete a Pinterest project without bloodshed (well, without MUCH bloodshed) and end up with a beautiful and functional garden feature in the process. Soon I will get to reap the rewards:)

First fruit

A happy baby with a happy tummy.


Photo Credit, from top:
Some creepy website
All the rest, me and Instagram Pin It

Fun With Magnets - Magnet Board Tutorial

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Pinterest is going to be the death of me.
I'm actually not exaggerating...much.

Ways Pinterest could kill me:

• Mr. Zinga could get sick of coming home to an untidy house and strangle me.
• My cholesterol level rising from yummy food ideas could result in massive heart failure.
• Accidental decapitation with a Skil Saw while repurposing pallets.  

 I'm fine, really. It's not a problem. I can stop pinning anytime I want to...I just don't want to.


I fell in love with the idea of making a magnet board for CeeCee the first time I saw one, on Pinterest of course. There are magnet boards for organizing makeup, keeping craft supplies tidy and I even saw one that had what looked like an herb garden growing on it. Considering how many different shapes and sizes they come in I was surprised there weren't more options for kids. Kids love magnets, mine does anyway, but magnets can be kind of sketchy. I don't know whats scarier, the risk of them choking or the risk of them swallowing two and having them stick together in their tummy. I decided the only way I was going to be comfortable with CeeCee playing with magnets was if I made them myself. My problem is I am horrible at crafts. I always start with the best intentions but usually end up swearing, bleeding and/or scrolling endlessly through the pages of Regretsy, thinking "It could be worse, Helen Killer could be featuring my crap...I mean craft"

You should also know that April Winchell AKA Helen Killer is my hero. She is living, blogging proof that sarcasm DOES pay off in the end. Take that Mom!

Now on to the crafting:)

Crafty Goodness

You will need:

• Cookie sheet  You can buy new or repurpose an old one one. It's a good excuse to buy yourself new bakeware
• One can of metal adhering spray paint  Don't be afraid to get colorful, kids love bright colors
• Page of stickers Use whatever characters your kids are into, we chose Sesame Street
• Sticky Magnet Paper You can find this stuff at most dollar stores. Look in photo frame or craft section
• SOS pad For scratching up the surface of the cookie sheet 
  

.

Stickers on magnet sheet

 I started with the magnets, mainly because it rained the day I planned on making this and I wanted to get what I could done. First I took the backing off of the magnet sheet. Handle it carefully because this stuff is super tacky. Next I carefully arranged the stickers to maximize space. Between the glue on the magnet sheet and the glue on the stickers these puppies aren't budging once they're in place so make sure you have them lined up how you want them the first time

Choose simple shapes that are easy to cut out

                                                                                               Carefully cut around each sticker making sure there were no sharp edges. On a side note, if you are wondering where I got the stickers from, it was an activity/coloring book. CeeCee loves to color but stickers are wasted on her so I always tear them out before I give her the book.

Finished Magnets

I also want to point out that you are the best judge of your kids interests and abilities so choose stickers that are going to be engaging to them and also size appropriate for their development level. Obviously if you have THAT kid (you know, the one that has to go to the ER to have the beads removed from their nose on a weekly basis) you may need bigger stickers.








The cookie sheet proved a little more difficult to make. Here is a fairly accurate description of the process:

Step 1

• Wait for a calm, sunny day
• Scrub all the baked on gunk off of cookie sheet with the SOS pad and scratch the heck out of the non stick surface AND nail polish in the process.
• Thoroughly dry cookie sheet (I put mine in the oven on broil for a few minutes just to be sure)
• Take everything outside and get organized, lay down a garbage bag to prevent Watermelon Pink grass incident
• Lightly spray cookie sheet, remembering Dad's words of wisdom that twenty thin coats is better than one gloopy mess
• Realize in horror that paint is not adhering to cookie sheet and is beading up in an alarming manner.
• Allow it to dry and hope that the next coat sticks better, check back in half an hour 

Step 2

• Peel back edges of garbage bag that have blown onto surface of cookie sheet and are now adhering to beaded up paint
• Apply second coat of paint, a little thicker this time to cover up the garbage bag smear marks and paint beads. Use handy nearby solar lights to weigh down the garbage bag.
• Realize in horror that you have gotten overspray onto husbands solar lights. Death by Pinterest #4 - Husband beats you to death with a Watermelon Pink solar light
• Realize that second coat of paint isn't sticking either, open bottle of wine at 10 am.
• Apply sheet of lacy white tissue paper to tacky paint in effort to hide garbage bag smears, paint beads and bits of grass blown over from neighbors yard (thank you SO much for choosing right now to mow, CAN'T U SEE IZ CRAFTING)
• Decide that rather than making it look vintage, tissue paper has made it look worse. Attempt to remove tissue paper only to find that the paint has instantly dried in places and has formed some type of spray paint/tissue paper paper mache.

Step 3

• Use convenient garbage bag to dispose of  cookie sheet, tissue paper and solar lights
• Consume remaining wine.

Voila! You have now created your very own set of  fridge magnets.

Handcrafted fridge magnets FTW

I think Helen Killer would approve.

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CeeCee's Montessori-ish Bedroom

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“Children are human beings to whom respect is due, superior to us by reason of their innocence and of the greater possibilities of their future.” - Maria Montessori

Those words were written a long time ago by one of the world's most revolutionary children's educators, Dr. Maria Montessori. They still ring true today.

Maria Montessori - 1933

A few of her concepts jumped out at me:

• Allow the child to be independent and learn through exploration, play and practical work (purposeful activity). 
• Create a safe, clean, orderly AND stimulating environment for the child
• Do not try to "teach" the toddler. Instead allow the child to absorb knowledge from the environment around them

This barely scratches the surface of Dr. Montessori's teachings but it's a good place to start. It's not like you have to do EVERY little thing by the book. To be completely honest I plan on avoiding a few of her teaching strategies.


For example, I don't believe that infants and toddlers need to eat from glass bowls and drink from actual glasses (not plastic) in order to teach them Control of Error. I prefer to teach that lesson using spillage, not breakage, as a learning tool. Spilled milk isn't going to result in a trip to the ER for stitches. Besides teaching them to eat is supposed to be messy. That's part of the fun.

Breakfast IS the most important meal of the day mommy:)

Bedtime had always been a challenge. She hated her crib...hated it. I'm pretty sure she looks at it as baby jail. I get it. She spent the first year of her life in bed with Mommy and Daddy. A crib was a regression. We converted it into a toddler bed but still, the stigma was already there. She liked being snuggled to sleep (Who doesn't?) and that just wasn't possible in a toddler bed with a sixty pound weight limit. We had to do something. I had just delivered our youngest daughter and intended to bed-share again and the thought of have four people in one bed was giving me nightmares, counterproductive when you consider bed-sharing is meant to allow you MORE rest. We contemplated putting CeeCee on a mattress directly on the floor but I wanted to research it first.


Enter my old friend, the Internet.


Somewhere along the way I came across the term Montessori Toddler Room. Several images popped up in Google, some more pretentious looking than others. Looking at these rooms I couldn't help getting excited. I would have LOVED a room like this when I was a kid. We slowly started the process of redesigning CeeCee's room using Montessori concepts.

We wanted CeeCee to be independent in her movements and choices, at least in her own room. She sleeps on a twin mattress that sits directly on the floor. She is able to climb into bed, out of bed, read in bed and jump on the bed without any interference or help from me. Her toys are neatly organized and rotated frequently.

CeeCee's Bed

The lower shelves of her bookshelf are filled with age appropriate reading materials. She even has a little chalkboard attached to the wall so she can doodle and draw without having to ask me for help. 

A few articles of clothing are kept on a lower bar in her closet so she can choose her own outfit. Her garbage can has a pedal on the floor to open it and is short enough for her to put garbage in but tall enough to prevent her taking garbage out. On the floor sits a switch that controls the lamp in her room.

The lamp is tall enough to prevent her burning herself on the bulb, the garbage can prevents her from tipping the lamp

Naturally we spent much time childproofing. By chance all of our electrical outlets are situated above our foundation walls (basement suite) so sticking her finger in a light socket isn't a big concern. Her bed is only 8 inches off the ground, not high enough to hurt herself should she roll out in the night. Furniture is anchored and/or untippable. Her door is never closed, instead a baby gate keeps her in, preventing her from roaming the house in the night but allowing us to hear her easily.

Age appropriate books at the bottom, books for when she's older up out of harms way

So far the experiment has proven successful. CeeCee loves playing in her new room and bedtimes are, for the most part, getting easier. The only downsides are that I spent more than I had intended redecorating and that it now look like the Disney Princesses threw up in my daughters room (don't judge, she loves the "pwincesses"). I don't know how Maria Montessori would feel about it, seeing as how we kinda cherry picked the ideas we liked and discarded the ones we didn't. I like to think she would approve, once her eyes adjusted to all the pink. Oh well, CeeCee loves it and that's all that matters.

After all, it's HER world.

More pictures of CeeCee's room...

Toys are neatly organized and rotated often

Books for later and a few knick knacks

Books for now

Hopscotch anyone?

CeeCee's chalkboard. Gotta love the carpet, circa 1972:)

Floor plug for the lamp. It is basically an extension cord and available in any hardware store. Close up on the hideous carpet

Changing station. Foundation walls make a great holder for my cloth wipe setup.

Double rods in closet make it easy to put clothes at her level while keeping delicate clothes out of harms way

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